


Three Hearts

by Jestana



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Don't copy to another site, F/M, Multi, sort of soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:28:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24065089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jestana/pseuds/Jestana
Summary: In a universe where people don't see colors until they meet a potential match, what does it mean when youalwayssee colors? It took Harry Carlyle over two decades to figure that one out and that only because he fell in love with his two best friends: Ellen Harlow and Alec Ryder.
Relationships: Alec Ryder/Ellen Ryder, Alec Ryder/Ellen Ryder/Harry Carlyle
Kudos: 2





	1. Coming Together

**Author's Note:**

> I've seen a fair number of fics pairing Harry with one of the Ryder twins, but it just didn't fit for me. What _did_ fit was Alec/Ellen/Harry. So I ended up writing this. I know this is the first fic with this trio as the pairing. I hope it will inspire others to give this ship a try.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry meets Ellen and Alec separately, and then the three become fast friends. Except there's a _slight_ problem: Harry falls in love with both Ellen and Alec. Now what?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is meant to follow the progress of Harry's relationship(s) with Ellen and Alec from meeting them up until the twins are young adults. It's more of a highlight reel, covering significant events.

"Excuse me, may I sit here?" At the question, Harry Carlyle looked up from his homework to see a young woman standing beside the table he'd claimed in the library. Around the same age as him, she had sleek black hair cut in a chin-length bob, pale blue eyes, and tan skin. She also had a backpack slung over her shoulder and a pile of books in her arms.

Nodding, Harry quickly shoved his own pile of books to one side, clearing a spot across from him. "Yes, of course. Please sit."

"Thanks." She set the books down with a relieved sigh, rubbing her forearms for a moment. "I remember you from freshman week. Harry, right?"

Harry nodded again, offering his hand. "Yes, Harry Carlyle. You're Ellen, correct?"

"Yep, Ellen Harlow." She shook his hand and sat down. "You're premed, too."

He grimaced, looking down at his datapad. "That depends on if I can pass the math classes."

"What's wrong?" Ellen frowned, leaning forward.

Sighing, Harry pushed his datapad across the table to her. "I'm doing the exact same steps Dr. Davis did when she went over a similar problem, but it keeps coming out wrong."

"That's because you're _not_ doing the exact same steps Dr. Davis did," Ellen replied after studying his work. "There's another couple steps you're missing."

Harry groaned. "I missed some notes, didn't I?"

"Show me your notes and I'll tell you," she countered with a playful smile.

Taking back his datapad, Harry pulled up his notes for math and handed it back to her. "Here."

"Yeah, you didn't write down part of the process." Ellen pulled out her own datapad and scrolled through it, then she handed both to Harry.

He looked between the two and grimaced. "Shit, you're right." Picking up his stylus, he began to copy the notes he missed. "She goes so fast that I have trouble catching everything."

"I have the same class at a different time. I'll gladly share my notes with you," Ellen offered after a moment of hesitation. "Only... how are you at chemistry?"

Harry grinned. "I love it. If I wasn't planning to be a doctor, I'd want to do something involving chemistry. Maybe biochemistry."

"If you help me with chemistry, I'll help you with math." Ellen extended her hand across the table, looking hopeful.

Still grinning, Harry shook her hand. "You have a deal."

*

"Excuse me, may I join you?" Harry tore his eyes away from the view out the window to see a young man standing beside the table he'd claimed in the lounge. Around Harry's age, he had dark brown hair combed back from his face, intense violet eyes, and dark brown skin. The name neatly stitched on his nametag was 'Ryder' and he held a gently steaming cup in each hand.

Nodding, Harry gestured to the empty chair nearby. "Sure, have a seat."

"Thanks." The stranger sat down and offered one of the cups to Harry. "Coffee?"

He accepted it with a smile and took a careful sip, hiding a grimace at the bitter taste of the black coffee. Setting it down, he offered his hand. "I'm Harry Carlyle."

"Alec Ryder." Amusement glinting in the violet eyes, Ryder shook Harry's hand. "Forgive me, but you don't seem the type to volunteer for an exploration mission."

Harry chuckled. "I know, but I've always loved the idea that we're not alone in the galaxy, that there _are_ alien races out there."

"Same here." Ryder nodded, taking a sip of his coffee. "When they discovered the alien technology last year, it was vindication of years of dreaming that there's other life out there besides humans."

Harry grinned, leaning forward in his seat. "My best friend actually apologized for teasing me about loving old science fiction movies and television shows when she heard the news."

"That was nice of her." Ryder chuckled. "My parents didn't apologize, but they stopped rolling their eyes when I'd quote them."

He laughed. "My friend was the one who encouraged me to join the expedition, even though I'm in the middle of premed. She said I shouldn't miss a chance to 'boldly go where no human has gone before.'"

"That's not accurate," Ryder pointed out, though he looked pleased all the same.

Harry laughed again. "I know, but the principle is the same."

"Good point." Ryder finished his cup and set it aside. "So, you're premed?"

This time, Harry grimaced. "Yeah. It'll be a pain to catch up once we return, but absolutely worth it in the end." Ryder nodded in agreement and Harry asked. "What about you? Were you studying anything when the news broke?"

"Computer science and robotics," Ryder answered promptly. "I'd love to see the alien tech, though, and compare it to what we've developed so far."

Harry laughed. "My best friend is also premed and wants to know if any of it can be used in medicine somehow."

"Hopefully, we'll find that out," Ryder told him.

He nodded his agreement. "Hopefully."

*

"Harry!" Ellen grinned and hugged him tight when she finally worked her way through the crowd at the shithole bar she'd insisted they meet at. "It's great to see you!"

Grinning himself, Harry hugged Ellen back, tight enough to lift her feet off the ground. "It's good to see you, too, Ellen. Where's this soldier you wanted me to meet?"

"Saving our table and our drinks for us. Come on." Taking Harry's hand, Ellen led him into the crowd of people, all taking advantage of a weekend off to drink.

He held Ellen's hand firmly as they worked through the crowd. On the one hand, he was glad Ellen had found someone she liked enough to want to date them. On the other hand, her request that Harry meet the man and offer his opinion had also prompted Harry to realize that he _might_ have developed feelings for his best friend that weren't as platonic as he thought they were. Despite this realization, he still agreed to meet this soldier. Depending on how it went, Harry might have a chance with Ellen after all. As they worked their way through the crowd, he spotted a familiar figure sitting at a table: Alec Ryder. His friend didn't seem to notice him at first, those violet eyes focused on Ellen. With a jolt, Harry realized she was leading him to Alec's table! When they reached it, Alec stood up to greet Harry with a backslapping hug. "Good to see you, Harry. I had no idea you were coming."

"I'm here to meet Ellen and a soldier friend of hers," Harry explained, indicating her. He raised an eyebrow. "You never told me his name was Alec."

A smile slowly spread across Ellen's face when Alec said, "She told me she wanted me to meet her best friend, but never told me _his_ name, either."

"To be fair, _neither_ of you mentioned each other by name to _me_ ," Ellen pointed out, grinning now.

They settled into the booth together, Alec and Ellen on one side and Harry on the other. Cradling his drink between his hands, Harry couldn't miss the way Ellen sat close to Alec, nor the way she burrowed into his jacket when he solicitously draped it over her shoulders. Harry pushed aside his disappointment. Clearly, they were smitten with each other, though Alec didn't seem to realize that Ellen was flirting with him. _They'll make a good couple._

*

When Harry's omni-tool chimed with an alert, he gladly sat back from his textbooks and answered the call. Ellen's face beamed at him from the screen. "Hi, Ellen."

"Hi, Harry!" She tucked her hair behind her ear. "I took your advice and just straight-up _asked_ Alec to go out with me."

He nodded, smiling and raising his eyebrows. "And?"

"And you were right. He completely _missed_ the fact that I'd been flirting with him." Ellen rolled her eyes. "Honestly, _you_ saw that I was flirting with him."

Harry chuckled at her exasperation. "He probably didn't want to assume it was flirting and risk taking a knee to the balls."

"Of _course_ you told him about that," Ellen gave a huff of laughter. "Anyway, Alec said yes to going out with me. I haven't quite figured out what we'll do, but thanks for your advice."

He nodded, smile firmly in place. "Of course, I'm glad I could help, Ellen. If you need ideas for a first date..."

"No, I'll figure it out, but thanks for the offer." Ellen smiled warmly. "How about you? Any lovely ladies catch your eye? Or handsome men for that matter?"

This time, Harry shook his head. "Nope, medical school is taking all my focus right now. Maybe once I start working."

"You need to _make_ time for a match, Harry," Ellen scolded him. "Not just put it off. There's so many beautiful colors out there."

He shrugged, biting back an explanation that he'd _always_ seen colors. He wasn't sure how she'd react to it and he was too tired to get into it at the moment. "I'm fine, Ellen. Don't worry about me. Enjoy your date with Alec."

"If you're sure." She looked doubtful.

Harry nodded firmly. "I'm sure."

"Fine. Let me know if that changes," Ellen requested, her expression earnest now.

"You'll be the first to know," he assured her. After they said goodbye and hung up, Harry pushed his fingers into his black hair with a heavy sigh. "So much for dating either of them myself."

Pushing those thoughts aside, he resumed studying. At least medicine didn't care.

*

"Alec, this is a pleasant surprise." Harry stepped aside so Alec could enter the apartment. "What brings you to my humble abode?"

His best friend of several years began to pace in the living room, rubbing the back of his neck. "There's-- I-- shit."

"Stop and take a deep breath, Alec," Harry told him, gripping Alec's shoulders. Nodding, Alec did so. "Let it out slowly." Alec slowly exhaled the breath he'd taken. "Now, what has you so worked up?"

Looking much calmer, Alec told him, "I want to propose to Ellen."

"You're certain that you want to spend the rest of your life with her?" Harry asked, ignoring a stab of disappointment at the thought of his two best friends marrying each other.

Alec nodded firmly, violet eyes determined. "Yes. The more time I spend with her, the more certain I am that we're a match."

"So why are you telling me this?" Harry wondered. "Shouldn't you be proposing to her?"

Looking sheepish, Alec said, "Well, I hoped you could help me figure out _how_ to propose."

"Ridiculous man," Harry muttered, echoing Ellen's usual epithet when she was fondly exasperated with either of them. "All right, do you have any ideas?"

Smiling brightly, Alec sat down on the couch and turned on his omni-tool. "Okay, so..."

After Alec left, a plan in mind, Harry slumped onto the couch and buried his face in his hands. His two best friends, both of whom he loved, would soon be engaged to each other. _Why did I take so long to figure out how I felt?_

*

Harry blinked in surprise when Ellen dropped her fork onto her plate with a clatter. She, Alec, and Harry had been eating leftover samples of food that would be served at the wedding reception. "Okay, enough."

"I beg your pardon?" Harry stared at Ellen in confusion. He'd barely touched his share of the food because he couldn't focus on that right now.

Alec gently set his fork down and wiped his mouth with his napkin. "You've not been yourself with us, Harry."

"You barely talk anymore," Ellen added, moving to the chair next to Harry's. "Have we done something wrong?"

He shook his head quickly, looking back and forth between them, clasping his hands tightly in his lap. "No, not at all."

"Then what's wrong?" Alec asked, his deep voice uncharacteristically gentle as he moved to the chair on Harry's other side.

Ellen covered his hands with one of hers. "We'd be pretty poor best friends if you can't tell us what's bothering you."

"No-- not this." He swallowed hard, his heart pounding in his chest.

His heartbeat sped up even more when Alec's large hand covered theirs. "We won't judge you, Harry. Please."

"Please," Ellen echoed, blue eyes meeting his green ones.

After a moment, he looked at Alec, seeing worry in his violet eyes. Quietly, dropping his gaze to their hands, he whispered, "I love you both and you'll be married in less than a week."

"Ridiculous man," Ellen murmured, just before she tilted his head up for a warm, deep kiss.

He stared at her when she released him, surprised. "I-- you-- we--"

"Very ridiculous," Alec agreed, turning Harry to him for another kiss, just as warm and deep as the one from Ellen.

Harry stared once Alec eased back, dumbfounded. "You-- you're not mad?"

"Only that it took you so damn long to figure it out." Ellen's tone was scolding, but her expression was all smiles. "You and Alec both, honestly. What is it about men and not knowing your own feelings?"

When Harry looked at Alec, his sheepish expression said enough. "So... now what?"

"That depends on what _you_ want," Alec told him.

Ellen kissed his cheek. "And be honest."

"I want to share your life as much as I can," he admitted once he'd managed to marshal his thoughts. "I know poly relationships aren't really accepted in the Alliance, but I don't care. I just want you both, in whatever way we can manage."

Alec kissed his cheek, still smiling. "We'll figure it out. Together."

*

His heart beating quickly from a combination of nerves and anticipation, Harry knocked on the door of the honeymoon suite he'd helped Alec book months ago. He'd never expected to be invited to join Alec and Ellen there, but that's what they'd decided after he'd admitted to his feelings for them. It was too late to cancel the wedding. Not that Harry would have asked it of his friends. Instead, they'd gone ahead with the ceremony and told Harry in no uncertain terms that he would join them for at least their wedding night. The door opened to reveal Ellen and Alec, both still in their wedding clothes, though her shoes and his bow tie were absent. Both smiled brightly when they saw Harry. "Good! Come on in, Harry."

"We've been waiting for you," Alec added as he and Ellen reached out and took Harry's hands, almost dragging him into the honeymoon suite.

He laughed, waiting for Alec to close the door behind him before kissing each of them in turn. "I wouldn't miss this for the galaxy."

"Mmm, now _that's_ a proper greeting," Ellen mused, breathless, once he'd finished.

Alec drew Harry's arm through his while Ellen slipped her arm through his other one. "We have a surprise for you."

"Oh?" Harry glanced between them curiously.

Nodding, Ellen told him, "We'd sort of been hoping you'd say something about how you felt."

"Not sort of," Alec corrected gently as they brought him to a stop in the middle of the sitting room. "We _were_."

Harry glanced between them, touched. "So you made plans even before--"

"Yes, we did." Ellen turned to the coffee table and picked up a familiar jewelry box. It matched the ones that had held Alec and Ellen's wedding rings.

He drew in a surprised breath when Alec opened it, revealing a ring that exactly matched his wedding band. "We know this isn't legally binding, Harry."

"But we want you to know that we consider you our husband," Ellen continued as Harry felt happy tears spill down his cheeks.

Alec nodded, picking up the ring. "And we want _you_ to consider _us_ your spouses in turn."

"I don't need promises," he told them, even as he offered them his left hand so they could slide the ring onto it together. "But thank you, all the same."

Ellen kissed him softly once the ring was in place. "We love you, Harry."

"And we'd shout it to the galaxy if we could." Alec kissed him in turn.

He nodded, admiring the gleam of the ring on his finger. In time, he would get used to the feel of it, but for now, he reveled in the novelty of the sensation. "And I love you both."

"Good." Ellen pressed close against his side, kissing and nipping at his neck.

Alec pressed tight against his other side, kissing and nibbling at the spot below his ear. "Let's get this wedding night properly started, hmm?"

"Oh, god." He moaned, surprised by the surge of desire he felt for them. "Um, before we, mmm, get started, I should warn you-- Oh!"

Ellen gave him an innocent look when he glanced down at her. "Yes, dear?"

"Did you just _goose_ Harry?" Alec asked, peering around him at Ellen.

Harry nodded, laughing. "Yes, she did." Before they could distract him, he continued, "What I was _trying_ to say is that I've never done this before."

"Done what? Slept with anyone?" Ellen asked, looking up at him curiously.

He nodded again, very aware that the two of them were still practically plastered against his sides. "Not at all?"

"Nope. Just kissed people." He'd been grateful for that past experience, but-- "I just never felt inclined to take things further. Until you two."

Smiling, Ellen stretched up to kiss him softly. "We'll only do what _you_ want, Harry."

"The moment you're uncomfortable, let us know," Alec kissed him with a gentle smile.

Harry nodded, relieved that they wouldn't make a big deal about it, but he should have known they wouldn't. "I will."

"Come on, let's see what you like best in the bedroom." Taking Harry by the hand, Ellen led him into the bedroom.

Alec and Harry laughed as they followed her. "Remember, Harry: sex should be fun and pleasant for everyone."

"Yes, dear."

*

Harry watched through the observation window as the transport from Earth landed in the docking bay. It'd been over ten years since humans had discovered the Prothean technology on Mars and here they were, living and working alongside alien species. It was a dream come true for Harry. The only fly in the ointment, as it were, was that he'd been on the Citadel for the last year or so alone. Alec and Ellen had remained on Earth while he tried to negotiate a transfer. Alec had finally managed it and now Harry's two best friends (and lovers) should be disembarking with the rest of the passengers from the shuttle. After a short wait, the first passengers began to emerge from the docking bay. Most were human, though one or two aliens were mixed among them. Just when Harry began to wonder if he'd gotten the date and time of their arrival wrong, he spotted Alec and Ellen walking through the door, him with his arm around her shoulders and her with her arm around his waist. Smiling, he waved and called out, "Ellen! Alec!"

"Harry!" Ellen waved back and gently broke away from Alec so she could hurry forward and hug Harry as tightly as she could.

He laughed and hugged her back, tight enough to lift her feet off the deck. When he set her down, Alec had joined them and hugged Harry, the two of them slapping each other's backs. "Hi, Harry. It's good to see you again."

"It's good to see _you_ ," he replied, smiling when Ellen slipped her arms through theirs and urged them towards the baggage area. "Your apartment is ready and waiting, except for what you brought with you."

Ellen rested her head against his shoulder for a moment. "Thanks for handling it for us, Harry."

"There's no one else we'd trust to handle it for us," Alec added, giving Harry a look that made him wish they were behind closed doors already.

It didn't take long for Alec and Ellen to claim their bags and Harry led them to the tram, which they rode in silence because many of the other passengers rode the tram with them. When they finally reached the apartment Harry had helped them pick and furnish, he keyed in the access code with a flourish. "Welcome home."

"Ridiculous man." Ellen stretched up to kiss Harry's cheek with a fond smile.

Alec nodded, lightly punching Harry's shoulder. "Very ridiculous."

"I do my best," Harry replied, following them inside.

The moment the door slid shut behind them, he found himself pressed back against it, both Ellen and Alec plastering themselves against him. Instead of taking turns kissing him like before, they kissed him together! He hadn't thought it was possible for three people to kiss, but somehow they managed it. As awkward and messy as it was, Harry could only melt into the kiss, wrapping an arm around each of them and pulling them as close as he could. Alec trailed biting kisses down Harry's neck while Ellen pulled off the gloves he'd taken to wearing. "We've missed you, Harry."

"We want you," Alec added, tugging at Harry's earlobe with his teeth.

He groaned when Ellen found the fasteners for his tunic and began to undo them. "Fuck, yes."

"We'll get to that," she assured him with a playful smile as Alec helped to push his tunic off his shoulders, leaving his chest bare to their admiring gazes.

Alec drew Harry into another hungry kiss. "First of all, where's the master bedroom?"

"This way." Harry led the way, their progress somewhat hampered by their efforts at undressing each other as they walked.

By the time they reached the bed, Harry was completely naked and his lovers weren't far behind. When Ellen stretched out beside him, he smoothed a hand over her stomach. It wasn't his imagination: there was a gentle swell to it that hadn't been there a year ago. Ellen covered his hand with hers and smiled tremulously when he looked up at her. "I'm pregnant."

"A couple months along," Alec added, pressing against Harry's back and kissing the nape of his neck. "We wanted to surprise you."

He arched into the curve of Alec's body, sighing at the familiar heat and weight. "That you did." Harry smiled happily at each of them. "Congratulations."

"Thank you, Harry." Ellen moved into his arms, kissing him sweetly and softly. "We want you to know that we consider this child yours as much as ours."

Alec peppered kisses across Harry's shoulders. "To that end, we'd like to name you their godfather. It's not the same, but at least if something happens, they'll have you."

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that." Harry's heart ached at the thought of losing Alec and Ellen, but he was also touched that they'd thought of a way to ensure he could still be part of their children's lives, no matter how many they had. Blinking back tears, he nodded. "Of course, I gladly accept the honor. Thank you."

Ellen smiled and kissed him again. "No, thank _you_ , Harry."

"We love you." Alec added, gently easing Harry onto his back so he could kiss him.

He smiled up at them, amazed that they still found ways to surprise him. "And I love you both. I could never give you up."

Smiling, they leaned down to kiss him again.

*

"Hello?" Harry poked his head into the hospital room. "May I come in?"

Ellen laughed, adjusting her position slightly. "Come on in, Harry, and meet your godsons."

"Terrence and Frederick," Alec added as Harry fully entered the room. Since he wasn't Ellen's husband, he hadn't been allowed in the birthing room with her and Alec.

He'd had to stay in the waiting room until Ellen had been settled in a hospital room and she and the twins had been made 'presentable'. He peered over Alec's shoulder at the baby. "Those are awfully big names for such tiny babies."

"Terry for short," Alec told him, carefully placing the baby in Harry's arms.

Harry cradled him close, taking in every inch of dark brown skin and the wisps of black hair on his head. When Alec stood up from the chair and gently guided him to sit down, he did so without taking his eyes off Terry. From the bed, Ellen added, "And this is Freddy."

"They're amazing," he whispered, looking over to see that the baby in Ellen's arms looked exactly like Terry. "How are you going to tell them apart?"

Alec, leaning on the back of Harry's chair, laughed. "We haven't quite figured that out yet. Terry was born first."

"By a minute," Ellen quickly added. "They have their bracelets for the moment, so we'll rely on those for now."

Harry nodded. He'd learned about babies and birth as part of his medical studies and had done research while Ellen was pregnant. It still hadn't prepared him for holding a baby in his arms that he would help raise. Looking down at Terry, he murmured, "Hello, Terry. I'm your Uncle Harry. I hope I'm a good godfather to you and your brother."

"You will." Alec squeezed his shoulder firmly before stepping to the bed to tenderly take Freddy from Ellen.

She smiled and watched sleepily as Alec knelt beside the chair so Harry could look at Freddy. "You'll be the best godfather, Harry."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence." Harry offered a shaky smile before looking at his other godson. "Hello, Freddy. I'm your godfather, Uncle Harry."

Freddy yawned widely and smacked his lips, looking for a moment like he was smiling. Harry and Alec looked at each other and laughed quietly. His eyes on Freddy, Alec murmured, "You're not the only one who's worried about doing right by the twins, Harry."

"Oh, Alec." His arms full, Harry leaned over and nudged his forehead against Alec's temple. "You'll be fine."

He shrugged, gently rocking Freddy. "Maybe, but we both know I have a tendency to get absorbed in my work."

"As long as you make an effort to spend time with them, you'll be fine," Harry assured him, though what Alec had said about work was true. More than once, Harry had accompanied Ellen to her appointments tracking her pregnancy because Alec was at work. In fact, Harry had been with her when she'd found out she was having twins.

Alec smiled wryly, nudging Harry's head with his. "I'll do my best."

"That's all we can ask of ourselves." Harry sat up and noticed that Ellen had fallen asleep, her face turned towards them. "Will Ellen continue her research?"

Nodding, Alec managed to stand up without disturbing Freddy and placed him in the bassinet. "Yeah, she feels that these initial implants can only do so much for biotics and wants to develop implants that can do even more for them."

"I've seen what asari can do with their biotics," Harry mused, remembering the first time he'd seen biotics in action. "I suppose Ellen wants to give humans the chance to match them."

Alec nodded, taking Terry and placing him in the bassinet with Freddy. "Yeah, humans are just-- we're so far _behind_ the other races."

"We'll catch up." Harry stood up and hugged Alec. "You'll see."

His lover returned the hug, but didn't say anything else. They just stood and held each other until Harry's omni-tool chimed to remind him that he had an appointment. He said his good-byes and reluctantly left. He couldn't wipe a small, sappy smile from his face as he walked down the corridor to the tram: _I'm a godfather!_

*

"Harry, thank goodness you're here." Alec greeted him with relief, five-year-old Terry perched on his hip.

Frowning, Harry stepped into the apartment. Before he could ask what was wrong, Alec drew him close for a soft kiss. When they parted, Terry had a disgusted look on his face. Laughing, Harry tweaked Terry's bare toes, making the boy giggle and squirm in Alec's arms. He looked at Alec and signed his question as well as speaking it, "What's wrong?"

"Mommy sad." Terry signed carefully, frowning with concentration as he formed the signs. "Went to bed and hasn't--"

Alec finished the sentence, helping Terry remember the sign he wanted, "Come out."

"Yes!" Terry made a triumphant noise as he signed his agreement.

Harry frowned, concerned. "Why would Ellen be sad?" At a sound of annoyance from Terry, he hastily signed the question. He still wasn't used to signing everything. "Did something happen?"

"Doctor's appointment," Alec answered succinctly. "The news really bothered her."

Terry looked between them, his frown incredibly reminiscent of his father's, and emphatically signed: "Signs!"

"Sorry, champ." Alec shifted him in his arms so he could press their foreheads together.

Harry patted Alec's shoulder. "I'll go talk to Ellen."

"Thanks, Harry." Alec reached up and covered Harry's hand with his before he headed down the hall to the master bedroom.

He tapped on the door once he reached it. After a moment, it slid open and Harry stepped inside to find Ellen curled almost into a ball in the middle of the bed with Freddy curled up against her. Freddy shifted and looked up at Harry, his expression uncharacteristically serious. He lifted his hands and signed, "Hi, Uncle Harry."

"Hi, Freddy, Ellen," Harry replied, both verbally and with signs. Perching on the end of the bed, he continued, "Can I talk to Mommy in private?"

Freddy glanced between Harry and Ellen for a moment, and then nodded. "Okay."

"Thanks." Harry bent to nudge Freddy's forehead with his. After Freddy left, Harry removed his boots and stretched out on his side facing Ellen. Quietly, he asked, "What did the doctor say?"

Shaking her head, Ellen rolled onto her other side, wrapping her arms across her waist. "No."

"Ellen, please." Harry shifted closer, gently grasping her shoulder.

She let him roll her onto her back, but kept her eyes closed, looking very distressed. "I-- The eezo-- you'll hate me."

"That's ridiculous." Harry eased closer and tried to slip his arms around her. Ellen half-heartedly resisted, eventually just laying limply in his arms instead of curling into him like she normally would. "I love you and _nothing_ can change that."

Scrubbing her eyes, she mumbled, "I can't have more kids, because of my research."

"Well, I'm sorry I won't get to spoil more godchildren, but I don't hate you for it," Harry replied after considering the news.

Ellen stared at him. "You don't care that I can't give you a son or daughter of your own?"

"In case you forgot, we have two adorable little boys," Harry reminded her.

She rolled her eyes. "They're not your biological children."

"I don't _care_ about biology," Harry replied, understanding now why Ellen was upset. "In every way that counts, Terry and Freddy are my sons as much as yours and Alec's. I know you wanted a large family like you grew up with, but I'm happy to have any family at all."

After staring for several moments, Ellen burst into tears and hugged him tightly. "Oh, Harry."

"I love you, Ellen," he told her, quietly and firmly. " _Nothing_ will change that."

Clinging to him, she replied, "I love you, too, Harry. So much."

*

"Alec. This is a surprise." Harry raised his eyebrows when he realized who had come visiting. "What brings you to my humble abode?"

Stepping inside at Harry's silent invitation, Alec asked, "Where's Terry? How is she?"

" _She_ is on a school trip," he explained, touched on Terry's behalf that her father was so concerned about her. "As for _how_ she is, she's under the impression that you think of her as your son rather than your daughter."

Groaning, Alec pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes. "Dammit, dammit, dammit."

"How did you manage to convince her that you don't accept her?" Harry asked, arms folded across his chest. He _knew_ Alec. If he hadn't rejected Freddy for being biotic, he would hardly reject Terry for being a woman.

Alec sighed deeply and slumped onto the couch. "I was distracted, still focused on work, and I didn't _think_ before I spoke."

"Oh, for-- Really?" Harry asked, utterly flabbergasted by the situation. "I'd ask if this was a joke, but I know you better than that. You usually stop to think before you speak. Most of the time."

It was a habit Alec had developed before Harry met him. Learning sign language to communicate with the twins when ear infections took most of their hearing as children had only reinforced the habit. Even ten or so years later, their hearing restored, they all still used sign language at times. Sighing, Alec told him, "Most is the key word, Harry."

"Clearly." Harry sighed and hugged Alec tight. "You'll have to apologize to her and tell her what you just told me."

Alec leaned into Harry with a sigh. "I know. Ellen told me she's moved in with you?"

"Yes. You're still welcome to visit, of course, but I can't guarantee that Terry will be here when you do." Harry's home had always been open to the others and he wasn't about to change that.

Nodding, Alec let his forehead rest against Harry's, the two of them just holding each other.


	2. Support

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The diagnosis of AEND for Ellen means she, Alec, and the twins need Harry's support more than ever and he needs theirs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These scenes are all either tweaked versions of Alec's memories that players unlock during the Ryder family secrets quests or inspired by them at least. I included Alec's tweaked logs as well because why not?

"Are you certain about this, Jeff?" Harry asked, keeping an arm around Ellen's waist.

His colleague nodded reluctantly. "Yes, I'm certain, Harry. There's nothing we can do except to make the end as comfortable as possible for Ellen." He looked at her, who'd been quiet ever since he'd told them the final prognosis. "I'm sorry, Ellen."

"Thank you, Dr. Barrett, for everything you've done." Ellen stirred herself and reached out to shake his hand.

He shook her hand, and then Harry's. "I wish I could do more."

"We know you've done everything you could," Harry assured him.

They finished saying their goodbyes and left Jeffrey's office. On the tram, Ellen turned and all but burrowed into Harry's arms. He held her tight, pressing his face into her hair, still sleek and black, a few tears escaping down his cheeks. Her voice muffled, Ellen told him, "I expected it, but _hearing_ it somehow just makes it real."

"I know," he whispered, rubbing her back soothingly. He'd given his share of news like this and it was never easy, but being on the other side was far worse. "Where's Alec again?"

Ellen flinched, burrowing even further into his arms. "He had a meeting."

"What was more important than finally having a verdict regarding your health?" Harry wondered. Alec had been very tight-lipped about his work lately and it bothered him. Especially since Alec was the one who'd insisted on exploring every possible avenue they could to stop or at least slow the progression of AEND.

She shook her head. "I don't know, but we should contact him."

"All right." He loosened his hold on her so she could turn and lift her omni-tool, entering the code for Alec's office. Harry stayed where he was, keeping an arm around her waist so she could rest hers on it if necessary.

After a short wait, it connected and they could see Alec sitting alone in his office, looking frustrated. He hadn't noticed that the comm terminal had accepted Ellen's call. After a moment, she said, "Alec."

"Ellen, Harry." The frustration melted away and he smiled at the sight of them. "What did the doctor say?"

Harry felt her take a deep breath before answering the question: "He told me to appreciate the time I have left." Alec's smile faded, replaced by disbelief as he signed the word 'no' over and over again. As she continued, Ellen clasped Harry's free hand with hers, "There's no cure, Alec. It's terminal."

"Not on my watch," Alec growled, his expression growing determined as he dashed away the tears that Harry could see threatening to spill down his cheeks.

Holding Ellen's hand tightly, Harry told him, "Jeffrey Barrett is the top in his field, Alec. This is his specialty. If there was _anything_ that could be done, he'd have told us."

"Please, Alec, let's just enjoy what time we have left together," Ellen added, her hand shaking in Harry's, though she managed to keep her other arm steady by resting it on Harry's.

Alec sighed and scrubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands. "I'll see you both later. I have some things to finish up."

"Alec--!" He was too late. Alec had terminated the call. "Shit. Why do we love him again?"

Ellen smiled fondly, turning so she could reach up and caress Harry's cheek, "Because he's driven and focused and when that focus is on _us_..."

"Hmm, good point." He couldn't stop a pleasant shiver from running down his spine as Ellen's words brought some memories to mind. Feeling the tram begin to slow down, he reluctantly shifted away so Ellen could loop her arm through his. "Where are the twins?"

As they stepped off the tram, she told him, "Freddy's waiting at the apartment and Terry wanted us to contact her."

"Do you want me with you for those conversations, too?" Harry asked as they walked down the corridor to the Ryder family apartment. With Terry living with Harry, both twins in the Alliance military, and Alec working long hours, it was rather empty most days now.

Ellen smiled up at him as she entered the code to unlock the apartment. "Always, Harry."

"Of course, Ellen." Smiling back, he followed her into the apartment.

The moment the door closed behind him, she pushed him back against it for a warm kiss, full of promise. Even as he responded with equal warmth and promise, a voice called from the sitting room, "Is that you, Mom?"

"Freddy." Ellen smiled as she reluctantly eased back from their kiss. She squeezed Harry's hand. "To be continued later."

When she stumbled as she moved back from him, Harry caught her and slipped an arm around her waist. She smiled up at him as they entered the sitting room. When they entered, they found not one but _two_ twins waiting for them. Terry, holding tight to her brother's hand, smiled nervously when they stopped and stared at her: "Hi, Mom. Hi, Uncle Harry."

"Oh, Terry, I didn't know you'd be here." Ellen gently pulled away from Harry and moved forward to hug her daughter.

Terry hugged her mother tightly, looking both relieved and worried. "I wasn't sure I could get here in time, so I didn't want to get your hopes up, just in case."

"Welcome home, Terry," Harry told her, walking over to greet her with a hug of his own. It'd been too long since she'd last been in the family apartment.

She hugged him back and whispered, "I almost have enough for top surgery. I'll want your advice for that."

"Of course," he whispered back, pressing his forehead against hers.

When Terry stepped back, Freddy took her place, hugging Harry tightly. "Always good to see you, Uncle Harry."

"How's your training going?" Harry asked, pressing his forehead to Freddy's for a moment.

Freddy shrugged diffidently. "Eh, okay."

"Where's Dad?" Terry asked once they sat down to talk, the twins on either side of their mother.

Scowling, Freddy leaned forward to tell her, "At work. He couldn't even get time off for--"

"Freddy, enough," Ellen interrupted, gently but firmly. "It was an important meeting and rescheduling it wasn't an option."

Though Freddy's jaw tightened, he didn't say anything else. Instead, Terry asked, "So, what'd Dr. Barrett say?"

"There's no cure," Ellen told them gently. Both twins gasped softly. Tears welled up in Terry's eyes and she hugged her mother tightly while Freddy signed 'no'. Hugging her daughter and kissing the top of her head, she added, "We just need to make the most of the time we have left."

Harry squeezed onto the couch with them, resting a hand on Terry's back as she sobbed into Ellen's shoulder. Freddy, his expression bleak, asked Harry, "He's sure, Uncle Harry?"

"He's the best in his field, Freddy," Harry reluctantly told him. "If he says there's nothing he can do, then that's that."

Nodding, Freddy's face crumpled and he began to cry as well, clinging to Ellen. Holding her children close, tears finally began to trickle down Ellen's cheeks, too. Despite the brave face she'd put on for Alec, she didn't want to die, but it was going to happen anyway. Feeling tears well up, Harry didn't try to stop them or wipe them away. One of the people he loved most in the galaxy was going to die and, despite his own medical training, he couldn't do anything to stop it.

*

_Amazing how life can change in an instant. Suddenly, my career doesn't matter. This incredible woman I've been married to all these years... she's facing the end. All I think about is the times I wasn't there for her. At least she had Harry, but I know she wanted **both** of us there. Well, that's going to change--it occurs to me that SAM might be more than I ever imagined.  
_

*

"Oh, Harry, it's good to see you." Ellen smiled and greeted him with a warm hug when he finally made it to the Ryder family cabin.

He hugged her back just as warmly, briefly pressing his face into her hair. Being on the Citadel without her and Alec again had been difficult. "It's wonderful to see you, too, Ellen."

"Come in." Taking his hand, she tugged him inside, and then kissed him soundly once the door closed behind him.

Harry responded eagerly to the kiss, but she broke it off with a slight cough. "Ellen?"

"It's nothing." She shook her head, and then led him down the hall to the master bedroom. "We knew you'd join us when you could."

He set his suitcases on the bed, and then drew her into a tight embrace, their foreheads pressed together. "Of course I would. Where's Alec?"

"In the lab." She sighed softly. "Come on, he'll be happy to see you, even if he _did_ forget that you were arriving today."

Harry smiled wryly, letting Ellen take his hand and lead him out to the backyard. The shed at the back of the property had served as a playhouse for the twins when they were little. Once they grew too old for that, Alec had converted it into a lab. When they entered, they found Alec standing at the workstation, his head bent over a computer terminal on top. Even before Alec and Ellen left for Earth, silver had begun to thread its way amongst the dark brown of his hair. Now the silver was more noticeable, forming streaks at Alec's temples. Clearing his throat, Harry said, "Hello, Alec."

"Harry?" Alec stopped in the midst of typing on a datapad and slowly looked up. His heart tightened in his chest when he realized the stress lines that bracketed Alec's nose and mouth had only grown deeper since he last saw him. A smile slowly curved his mouth, easing the stress lines, but deepening the smile lines at the corners of his violet eyes. "You finally made it."

Ellen sighed deeply as Alec set down the datapad and moved around the workstation to hug Harry tightly, both of them pounding on each other's back. "I _told_ you he was coming, Alec."

"I'm not hurt, Ellen." Harry assured her, just before Alec kissed him, deeply and hungrily.

He responded with equal hunger, gripping Alec's jacket tightly. Before they could get carried away, Alec eased back. "To be continued."

"Tease." Ellen pretended to scowl at Alec, but a smile twitched at her mouth.

Harry followed as Alec returned to the workstation. "Only if he doesn't follow through, and I have a feeling he will."

"Oh, yes." Alec winked at Harry.

Rolling her eyes, Ellen asked, "So, are you going to tell us what you've been working on?"

"You don't know?" Harry asked, surprised.

Alec looked sheepish. "I wanted to tell you both at the same time: I may have found a way for us to beat AEND."

"Alec..." Ellen sighed, shaking her head, folding her arms across her chest.

Raising his eyebrows, curious, Harry asked, "What have you figured out that the top experts in the field haven't?"

"It's simple, we take SAM..."

Ellen and Harry looked at him curiously and asked at the same time: "Who?"

"I named the AI: 'Simulated Adaptive Matrix.' SAM." Alec gestured to the computer terminal on his workstation. "We use Ellen's research and interface SAM with an implant."

She shook her head, looking thoughtful and worried. "Um... my work on biotic implants was yielding results, but this... I don't know."

"Ellen's work is why she has the damned disease in the first place," Harry reminded Alec. It'd also effectively sterilized her.

Glancing at Harry, Alec asked Ellen, "What did the doctor say?"

"Alec..." Ellen looked down at the floor, away from either of them.

Harry closed the distance between them, gently gripping her arm. "What did he say?"

"Tell him," Alec urged her with a nod of his head.

Ellen sighed deeply. "It's getting worse."

"No..." Harry whispered, embracing her tightly. He'd just gotten to Earth.

Alec nodded sadly. "There's your answer." He gestured to the computer terminal in front of him. "This _will_ work. SAM can fix you."

"Alec, I'm not some war you have to win..." Kissing Harry's cheek, Ellen drew away so she could move to the workstation, into Alec's space. "You're not an N7 anymore."

"That doesn't mean we--" Harry began, following her over, resting a hand on her back.

Alec met Harry's eyes and he could see his own desperation to keep Ellen with them just a little longer reflected in the violet depths. "We can't--"

"They kicked you out of the Alliance for this." Ellen interrupted, glancing at Harry over her shoulder, as if to gauge his reaction.

Harry stared at Alec in surprised shock at the news. Alec leaned forward, his expression determined and stubborn, "We're talking about your _life_."

"I suspected it would happen," Harry admitted. "Just not already."

Sighing, Ellen quietly asked, "Alec, did you ever consider that maybe it's my time to go?" He looked away, at everything except Ellen or Harry. "I'm human... we die." Here, his eyes snapped back to Ellen. "It happens."

"Ellen, _please_. Losing you is not an option." He clasped Ellen's hand with his on the workstation. "The kids aren't going to lose their mother. God knows they never had a father."

Harry moved so he cover their clasped hands with his. "Then _give_ them one. I can only do so much for them."

"They'd just ask for a refund," Alec retorted with a self-depreciating smile.

Ellen rolled her eyes at him, and then looked down at the computer terminal. "So can this SAM talk yet?"

"Hello, Ellen, Harry." A strange voice piped up from the terminal, startling them. "Why did the tree go to the dentist?"

Ellen and Harry exchanged glances, puzzled by the question. "Uh..." "Um..."

"To get a root canal." The AI didn't seem to need a proper reply.

Both Ellen and Harry laughed, more at the deadpan delivery than because they found the joke funny. Alec smiled sheepishly. "Humor algorithms. Can't seem to get the hang of it."

"Or maybe it's the guy teaching him?" Harry suggested, exchanging a fondly exasperated smile with Ellen.

Alec made a face at them and Ellen giggled. She stifled a cough the next moment and suggested, "Let's go into the house and talk some more."

"Yeah, just, Ellen--" Moving around the workstation, Alec drew her into a tight embrace. "Please consider it? He'll at least give us a little more time as a family."

Harry wrapped his arms around them both. "I'd appreciate more time."

"I'll consider it, but that's all I'll promise right now, okay?"

They nodded, accepting that. It was ultimately Ellen's decision in the end.

*

_E: Give me that, Alec. We've heard enough of you talking. Right. So, here's the irony. My research on biotic implants and eezo caused this stupid disease. But maybe it'll save me, too._

_A: No "maybe" about it._

_E: Hey, this is **my** secret log. Harry, why don't you distract him?_

_H: Gladly. [sounds of kissing]_

_E: Anyway, the right type of implant, joined with the right type of AI could actually bolster human physiology. Even as the disease is trying to kill me, the implant and SAM are counteracting it, keeping things balanced._

_H: [breathless] Result: Ellen gets to stick around a little longer. Maybe collect on all those anniversary dinners Alec owes her._

*

"Do I hear the car?" Ellen asked Harry as they sat together in the living room.

He stood up to peer out the window. "Yes, Freddy's back. Is that-- Wow, Terry's picture didn't do her justice."

"What, really?" With some effort, Ellen pushed herself to her feet and looked out the window. "Oh, my goodness. Come on, I can't wait for them to come inside."

Laughing, Harry gently pulled her arm through his so they could walk onto the front porch. "Of course, my lady."

"Ridiculous man." Ellen kissed him softly before opening the front door so they could step onto the front porch. As they watched the twins, Freddy laughed and took Terry's suitcase out of her hand. Ellen spoke before Terry could object: "Terry?"

Terry turned in place, smiling when she spotted Ellen and Harry. She quickly crossed to the porch and hugged Ellen as tightly as she dared, whispering hoarsely, "Mom."

"I've missed you so much," Ellen whispered, hugging Terry tightly as she could. "Emails and comms just aren't the same."

Her tears falling freely, Terry managed to choke out, "Same, Mom."

"Gee, Terry, did you miss Mom?" Freddy asked cheerfully as he joined them.

Laughing, Terry gently eased back from the hug, signing to her brother as she did: "Fuck off."

"Language, Terry," Ellen scolded with a feigned glare. "I taught you better than that." She cupped Terry's cheek with one hand. "You _look_ happier, all things considered."

Terry smiled down at her mother. "I _am_ happier, Mom. I'm _me_ now."

"Good." Ellen drew her head down to press their foreheads together. "That's all I ever wanted for you." She smiled up at Freddy. " _Both_ of you."

Grinning, he bent to press his forehead to Ellen's once Terry stepped back. "Love you, Mom."

"Oh, yeah. Me, too," Terry quickly added, hugging Harry. "And you, Uncle Harry."

He hugged her back, pleased that his recommendation for her top surgery had worked out. "Hello, Terry. It's good to see you."

"Good to see you, too." She tapped her forehead against his.

Freddy grinned as he hugged Harry once Terry moved away. "Hi, Uncle Harry. It's been _far_ too long since we last saw each other."

"Ridiculous man," Harry lightly shoved his godson's shoulder as they trooped into the house. "I hope you don't mind sharing with Freddy again, Terry."

"Of course not." She smiled fondly at her brother. "We've _always_ shared."

He grinned back at her. "Yep. _Always_."

"Good, go put your things down and freshen up if you need to," Ellen told them, sitting on the sofa. "We'll wait out here."

They wasted no time taking Terry's duffle bag and suitcase to their bedroom. Freddy returned moments later, sitting down next to Ellen. Quietly, Harry asked, "How's Terry doing?"

"She's not going to hide from Dad," Freddy told them, his ever-present smile missing for once. "She's worried about his reaction to her, though."

Harry nodded, rolling his eyes at the memory of Alec's reaction when Ellen had showed him the picture she'd sent after she'd healed from her top surgery. _"Terry always looked good."_

Before they could talk further, Terry returned, her make-up looking fresher. Harry tried to offer a reassuring smile while Freddy asked: "Ready to see Dad?"

"No, but I never _will_ be, so let's just get it over with." Terry rubbed the back of her neck in a familiar nervous tic that made Harry's heart ache.

Ellen smiled understandingly as Harry helped her stand up. "It'll be fine, Terry. Trust me."

"I wish I could, Mom." She smiled apologetically as she took Ellen's other hand.

Harry nodded to her over Ellen's head. "Let's get it over with, hmm?"

"Yes, probably for the best." Freddy fell into step with Terry as Ellen and Harry led the twins out the back door and across the yard to Alec's lab.

As per usual, Alec stood at workstation, head bent over SAM's router. Alec's hair was almost more silver than brown now and Harry knew the stress lines around his mouth and nose were even deeper. Freddy's habitual cheer sounded a little forced as he said, "Hey, Dad."

"Hi, Freddy," Alec answered absently, picking up a datapad to begin tapping away on it, never once looking up.

Ellen sighed and shook her head. She turned and gestured at Terry. Very nervous, Terry joined her brother and said, "Hi, Dad."

"Terry?" He finally stopped working and looked up at her. She stood straight-backed and firm as Alec Ryder looked her up and down. A small smile curved his mouth and he told his daughter. "You look well."

Terry managed a small smile of her own in response. "Yes, I'm good, Dad."

"Good, good." He nodded looking back at the computer terminal on his workstation.

Freddy gave an exasperated sigh and shook his head. He caught Terry's eye and signed, "See? He's focused on _that_."

"Finally." Harry, perhaps, spoke a little _too_ loudly, trying to catch Alec's attention before he could become absorbed in his work again. "The Ryder clan is in one room. Feels like it's been years since we were all together."

Alec glanced up, distracted, as Freddy added facetiously, "Or more."

"Well, I'll take whatever I can get," Ellen returned with a sharp look for her son, not rising to his bait. "I've missed you two."

Terry hesitated a moment as Harry moved around to stand beside Alec, and then asked, "How are you feeling, Mom?"

"Nope, we're not doing that," Ellen replied, signing 'no' as she shook her head firmly. "Only one rule for this visit: no talking about me. I'm fine." Alec looked back down at his work, but didn't pick up the datapad he'd set down, which Harry took as a good sign. "And when I'm not, the pills help. Deal?"

Reluctantly, Terry nodded. "Okay."

"Fine." Freddy sighed heavily.

Ellen nodded, smiling warmly at them. "Good. Let's talk about something else."

"Alec?" Harry prodded at a look from Ellen, poking Alec in the side to catch his attention.

He batted at Harry's hand and looked up, glancing between Terry and Freddy, clearly racking his brain for something to say. "Uh..."

"Really?" Ellen asked, her hand resting on Terry's back, and gave him a Look.

Terry moved away from her mother and leaned on the end of his workstation as he finally got out, "Well. You're both, uh, looking... taller."

"Yeah, Dad. That _does_ tend to happen." Freddy, his arms folded across his chest, gave him a sardonic look. 

Alec glanced down at his workstation, rubbing the back of his neck. "Right, right. I know. So, uh..." None of them spoke, making him think of something to say for once. Finally, Alec looked up at Freddy. "I heard the Alliance has a new Mako in the works."

"Yeah, word is, they can air-drop _this_ one from a ship." Freddy nodded, perking up.

Terry looked relieved as she nodded her enthusiastic agreement. "I know! They're saying we might get one on our next expedition."

"You're still poking around the Attican Traverse?" Alec asked, confirming that he _had_ been listening when Ellen and Harry told him about Terry's work.

She leaned forward, violet eyes shining with her enthusiasm. "We think we might've found a Prothean site." Reluctantly, she added, "No artifacts yet, but we're still digging."

"I remember the day they found the first ruins on Mars. Changed our lives--" Alec glanced at each of them, sharing knowing smiles with Ellen and Harry. "We knew for _sure_ that aliens were real. We just had to go find them."

Freddy also leaned forward on the workstation, gesturing as he talked. "Yes! Every day, I wake up, I'm looking at that mass relay and I keep thinking: what's on the other side?"

"Don't lose that." Alec reached up to rest a hand on each of their shoulders, his eyes intense as he looked between the twins. "The minute you stop wondering what's beyond the mountain, you die a little inside."

The subtle tension in Terry's shoulders eased as she told him, "No chance of that. It's in our blood--you infected us."

"What was it like, Dad, Uncle Harry?" Freddy leaned even further forward, his violet eyes intent and curious as he looked between Alec and Harry. "When you went through that first relay?"

Harry answered with a laugh: "Don't believe the stories. The Charon relay scared the _shit_ out of every last one of us."

"Admiral Grissom included," Alec added with a conspiratorial smile. As they laughed, he continued, "Why don't we go have this dinner Harry's been slaving over all day and we'll tell you all about it?"

Nodding, Terry and Freddy left the lab ahead of Alec, Ellen, and Harry. The three of them hugged each other for a moment, their foreheads pressed together. Then they followed the twins, the two men on either side of Ellen. _It's good to have the whole family together again._

*

_Terry came home today. It's the first time we've seen each other since she came out to me. I admit, I was an idiot. She just caught me off-guard and I didn't stop to think. The look on her face... I might as well have slapped her. I wanted to apologize, god, how I wanted to, but an emergency came up that I couldn't ignore. Then we were never on the Citadel at the same time long enough for us to meet up. Then she left for training and that put an end to any chances to see her again. Ellen, Harry, and Freddy have kept in touch with her at least, so I know how well she's been doing, but I've missed talking to her. After her top surgery, she sent Ellen and Harry a picture, but it didn't prepare me for seeing her in person. She's grown into a beautiful, strong young woman and I couldn't be prouder of her. Still, face-to-face with my daughter at last and I didn't know what to say. How to begin to apologize for being an idiot after all these years. So I... didn't. I just acted like everything was fine between us. I know I disappointed her with my lack of reaction, but she went along with it. Someday, we'll have to sit down and talk it out. I'm not sure when that will be, though._  


*

"How did your meeting go?" Harry asked when Alec returned from said meeting. "Did Jien Garson want to talk to you about the Andromeda Initiative?"

His lover hesitated for several long moments, unzipping his jacket with one hand while rubbing the back of his neck with the other. "Um, funny story: I didn't actually meet Jien Garson."

"What?" Harry sat up straight, lowering his datapad to his lap. "Then who _did_ you meet?"

Alec sat down beside Harry on the couch. "Before I tell you, where's Ellen?"

"Taking a nap." He saved his work and set the datapad on the table. "Alec?"

Sighing, he slumped back against the couch. "I guess Jien's the visionary, the one who gets everyone excited about the project and drums up publicity. But then this 'benefactor' apparently provides resources and money." He looked up at Harry, violet eyes meeting green. "And I mean a _lot_ of money."

"Benefactor?" Harry asked, raising his eyebrows even as he scooted closer. "No name?"

Alec shook his head. "Nope, and their image kept changing to different species and genders."

"That sounds as shady as..." he trailed off, unable to think of an appropriate analogy. "They wanted to recruit you for the Andromeda Initiative?"

This time, Alec nodded, scrubbing his fingers through his hair, which was almost completely silver now. "Yeah, they want to fund my work on SAM."

"Your work--" Harry narrowed his eyes at Alec, surprised. "They know--"

Another nod and Alec looked at Harry helplessly. "We're out of money, except for what you and the kids make every month and that's not enough. No one will talk to me besides you four."

"You can't finish SAM," he concluded, absently rubbing his wedding ring. "And this benefactor will help?"

Alec slowly nodded, reaching over to clasp Harry's hand. "They'll provide me with the time and resources I need to finish developing SAM so he can save Ellen."

"That's... a lot." Harry frowned even as he gently squeezed Alec's hand. "What do they want in return for it?"

He returned the gentle squeeze. "To have access to the money and resources, I'd have to join the Andromeda Initiative."

"You'll... move to Andromeda?" Harry stared at Alec in shock. "What about..."

Alec shifted closer so he could press his forehead to Harry's. "You and the twins are welcome to join, too. They'll need doctors and explorers, people ready to rough it."

"Where _you_ go--" Harry began, his breath catching in his throat when Alec cupped his cheek.

"It's a chance to save Ellen, Harry," he whispered. "How can I turn it down?"

He thought of Ellen, asleep in their bedroom, growing weaker by the day, Harry whispered back. "You can't."

"I can't."

*

_I accepted the Initiative's offer. They're calling me a 'Pathfinder.' There's no other option left--SAM will never happen without their help. All our savings are gone and no one will return my calls. I am a pariah. There's something strange going on with this benefactor, but... Ellen's getting worse. I can't fail her._

*

Harry leaned against the side of Ellen's bed, unable to cry despite the grief tearing him apart inside. Terry and Freddy stood on the other side of Ellen's bed, their eyes red from crying, though neither shed tears as they stared down at their mother. Alec, never one for staying still, paced away and back. Stroking Ellen's still-black hair, Harry murmured, "I'm sorry we couldn't do more for you, Ellen."

"Don't apologize, Harry." She reached up and caught his hand, giving it a squeeze. When Alec returned to her bedside, Ellen mustered a wan smile for him. "It was a good fight, soldier."

Alec shook his head, gripping the bed frame tightly with both hands. "It's not over yet."

"Alec..." she admonished quietly.

Another shake of his head. "No..."

"Alec, we have a few hours," Harry reminded him gently, covering his hand on the bed frame.

Ellen tried to move her hand to cover theirs, but didn't quite manage it. "Let's enjoy them."

"And after that?" Alec asked, glancing at Harry, and then Ellen.

She smiled weakly up at them. "You'll still have each other."

"But we want _you_ , Mom," Terry replied, reaching down to take Ellen's hand.

Freddy covered their hands with his, completely serious as he said, "I love you, Mom."

"I love you. Both of you." Ellen gazed longingly at the twins. Mustering strength from god only knew where, she told them, "Live your lives. Do great things. I see so much potential in you. And remember..." she paused, turning her head towards Alec and Harry, blue eyes fond. "Fall in love, at least once."

Alec's other hand shook as he reached down to clasp Ellen's hand. Harry's wasn't much better as he covered both with his hand in turn. Tears trickled down Freddy's cheeks as he told them, "We'll let you guys talk."

"Love you, Mom," Terry whispered before she and Freddy left, each wrapping an arm around the other as they disappeared through the door.

Harry moved closer to Alec, wrapping his arm around him, tears finally escaping down his cheeks. Alec remained dry-eyed, but Harry could feel the tension in him as Ellen told him, "Say it, Alec."

"No," Alec whispered, shaking his head.

Harry tightened his arm around Alec. "Then I will: Goodbye, Ellen." He bent down to press his forehead to hers. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Harry," she whispered, managing to lift her free hand to rest on the back of his head for a moment.

When he straightened up, Alec leaned down to press his forehead to hers in turn, whispering, "Don't go, Ellen."

"Watch out for the twins," she whispered, threading her fingers through his silver hair. "Be there for them?"

Alec nodded, his voice rough with emotion. "I will."

"Mourn me, Alec, Harry," she told them once Alec had straightened up. "But don't let this destroy you. What did you use to say when you were an N7?"

Somewhere, Harry managed to summon a smile at the reminder of one of Alec's favorite sayings, "When your back's against the wall..."

"If you can't run from it, use it," Alec finished, a tear finally slipping down his cheek.

Ellen nodded, her eyes on them. "Remember that. Be strong."

"Never as strong as you." Alec took a deep breath. "I love you, Ellen."

Her hand twitched under both of theirs. "I love you, too, Alec."

Ellen's eyes fluttered shut just as Harry's omni-tool chimed with an alert. Scrubbing his eyes quickly, he brought it up to check what it was for. "Dammit. One of my patients needs me."

"We'll be fine," Alec assured him, hugging him briefly.

"I know you wouldn't go if you weren't needed," Ellen added, barely loud enough for him to hear her at all.

Giving a frustrated sigh, Harry kissed Alec's cheek and Ellen's forehead before leaving the room. The twins looked up at his appearance, quickly getting to their feet. "Uncle Harry?"

"Duty calls, I'm afraid," he told them, gathering them into a hug. "Otherwise, I _would_ stay."

They hugged him back, Terry gripping his tunic tightly with one hand. "We understand. You love Mom too much to leave her unless it was an emergency."

"It is." Harry tapped his forehead against each of theirs in turn before heading down the corridor to the tram. He hated leaving at this most crucial moment, but there were lives he _could_ save.

*

"You did _what_?" Harry demanded, utterly shocked by what Alec had just told him.

Looking defensive, Alec repeated, "I put Ellen in stasis after she fell asleep, but before she died."

"This is _exactly_ what she _didn't_ want us to do," Harry reminded him, beginning to pace. "It was her time to go and she didn't want us to interfere."

Alec rubbed the back of his neck. "I know, but we're traveling to Andromeda. Maybe life took a different turn there and we'll find a cure for Ellen and not just a palliative."

"Which one of us is the doctor again?" Harry asked rhetorically, amused that Alec had picked up medical terminology over the years.

His lover waved off the question. "That's beside the point. If we _weren't_ going to Andromeda, there wouldn't be a reason to put Ellen in stasis."

"Alec?" Harry stopped mid-pace and turned to closely at his friend and lover. After all these years, he could tell that there was something he was holding back. "What is it? What do you know that I don't?"

He looked out the window, refusing to meet Harry's eyes. "You know those Reapers Commander Shepherd's been warning about?"

"Yeah, the Council refuses to believe her." Harry nodded, shuddering at the thought of a species designed to wipe out all sentient life.

Alec sighed deeply. "I contacted Castis Vakarian and he said Garrus believes Shepherd and so does he."

" _Shit_." Harry swore, walking over to hug Alec tight. "So everyone we leave behind..."

Hugging Harry back, Alec nodded, his voice hoarse. "Yeah. We'll be all that's left of Milky Way civilization as we know it."

"Wait, this benefactor--" Harry eased back enough to catch Alec's eye. "Did they know? Is that why--?"

Alec shrugged. "They didn't know it'd be the Reapers, specifically, but they knew _something_ was coming. Something big."

"Fuck." Sighing, Harry leaned forward to rest his forehead on Alec's shoulder. "Please tell me that the twins are coming with us."

Nodding, Alec kissed Harry's cheek. "Yes, they're coming, too. Freddy's training alongside Cora Harper to be a Pathfinder himself someday and they'll both be Recon Specialists on the Pathfinder team for the _Hyperion_."

"As if you'd let them be posted anywhere else," Harry muttered, kissing Alec's cheek in return, relieved that they wouldn't lose the twins, either.

They just stood there, holding each other in silence. Harry was still a little upset that Alec had put Ellen in stasis against her wishes, but there was a selfish part of him that was relieved they hadn't lost her yet. Not entirely. _We could still be a family again..._

*

_We've just arrived in Andromeda. Before the rest of the **Hyperion** wakes up, I've checked our comms for any signals from the Milky Way. Looks like sometime in 2186, everything went to hell. We got out just ahead of it. Commander Shepherd was right. So was our mysterious "benefactor."_

_Alec, this is Jien Garson. For the record. Year 2185. It's about "Fulcrum." I'm on the Nexus and we're going into stasis for the voyage. Looks like you're already asleep. I'm... very uncomfortable with our "benefactor," and the fact that we **still** don't know who they are... and all these lives in our hands. I should've done something sooner. This is all very troubling, Alec. Let's talk as soon as you reach Andromeda._

_Jien, I got your message about "Fulcrum." It's now 2819. We reached Andromeda, but have no sign of the Nexus. I have the same concerns as you. In all likelihood, the Milky Way... well, something terrible happened there. At least the benefactor spared us from that and Reapers. But why keep hiding? Something's off. But we've got bigger problems at the moment--Habitat 7 may be a bust. Finding a home is all that matters now._

*

"Did the world just turn upside down or am I still dreaming?" Liam Kosta asked, cradling his head in his hands.

Harry wasn't a stranger to anti-gravity accidents and had seen the way Liam pinwheeled in the air before Cora Harper managed to reset the gravity. A quick probe with his fingers confirmed what he'd suspected: "It left a nasty bump on your head. Let me take a look."

"First five minutes in Andromeda, and we're already crashing the car," Liam muttered as Harry scanned him with his omni-tool.

He raised his eyebrows as he studied the data his omni-tool provided, catching Terry's eye as she hesitated nearby. "You thought it'd be easy?"

"No, but I figured any scars could wait 'til we land." Liam held still as Harry conducted a brief non-tech examination of his own. "Well?"

Winking at Terry, Harry told him, "No obvious contusions to your brain. Looks nice and pink."

"Wait--the cut's that deep?" Liam peered up at Harry worriedly.

Keeping his voice calm, Harry told him, "Just kidding. Checking for a concussion. Your cognitive awareness seems okay."

"Uh... right." Liam frowned up at Harry while Terry quickly stifled her own laughter. "Where'd you get your degree, doc?"

Pleased that he'd distracted Terry for the moment, Harry blithely replied, "No need. They'll let anyone be a doctor around here."

"What?" Liam looked genuinely concerned now.

Feeling bad for him, Harry just said, "Good. Your auditory response seems normal, too."

Terry finally laughed at that one, signing to Harry "You asshole."

"Yes, I am," he signed back before she continued on her way.

"I thought doctors were supposed to have _good_ beside manner," Liam commented after watching Terry stop to speak with Kirkland and Fisher.

Harry chuckled. "It's all relative. You're clear for duty."

"Thanks, doc." Liam stood up and tapped Harry's arm with his fist before wandering off.

He continued working with Lexi to check that no one else had suffered more than minor bumps and bruises from their brief flirtation with anti-gravity. That part of his duties complete, he headed to the staging room to suit up. He entered to find Alec in his jumpsuit already, but the room was otherwise deserted. "Alec."

"Harry." A relieved smile spread across Alec's face and he opened his arms.

He gladly stepped into Alec's embrace, hugging him tightly. After a brief kiss, he asked, "How does it look outside?"

"Not good," Alec admitted when Harry moved away to change into his own jumpsuit. "Habitat 7 doesn't look remotely habitable, but we still need to see for ourselves."

Harry nodded, the two of them helping each other with their armor like they'd done years ago on the Charon expedition. "You heard about Freddy?"

"SAM told me there were complications with waking him from cryo?" Alec tried to keep his voice steady, but Harry knew him well enough to know he was worried.

He nodded again, checking the seals on Alec's armor for him. "Yeah, Lexi wants to keep him in a coma for now, make sure nothing bad happened to him."

"I doubt Terry's taking it well," Alec murmured with a sigh.

Rolling his eyes, Harry bumped Alec's shoulder with his. " _You're_ not taking it well, either."

"Neither are you," Alec retorted, returning the shoulder bump.

SAM piped up before Harry could respond, "Pathfinder, Dr. Carlyle, Lieutenant Harper and Terry are approaching."

"Right, break's over, back on my head," Harry stood up and shook out his limbs. The armor felt strange after being a civilian doctor for so long.

Alec stood up and drew Harry close for a last hug and a tap of their foreheads. "Don't take too much longer."

"Yeah, yeah." Harry watched Alec retrieve his helmet before heading out to the docking bay where two shuttles were being prepped for their trip to the surface.

The door from the corridor opened to admit Terry and Cora. While the latter moved to her locker and began to change into her armor, the former approached Harry, asking, "How's Freddy?"

"He's fine for now." Harry gripped her shoulder firmly. "You know your brother. He'll pull through in no time."

Terry nodded, her arms folded across her waist. "I know. I just don't like that he's missing out on everything. It's what he dreamed of."

"I know." He squeezed her shoulder, and then released it. "You know he'd want you to carry on."

Another nod and Terry turned to open her locker, finally beginning to change into her armor. Pleased, Harry grabbed his own helmet and stopped by the good luck rock before heading out to the landing bay. Despite the rough start, he looked forward to seeing a strange new planet for the first time in decades (ignoring 600 years of cryosleep).

*

_Dunn's agreed to a scouting mission on Habitat 7. Everyone's gearing up now. I'm worried about Freddy. Dr. T'Perro and Harry both say he'll be fine, but... he's my son. How can I not worry? It's these moments when you wish you'd told your children you loved them more often. Or ever. Which brings me to the tough part: Kids, if anything happens to me, there are... things you're going to find out. I hope you understand. Terry, I'm sorry for how I reacted when you came out to me. You surprised me, but that's no excuse. I have **always** been proud to call you my daughter. Freddy, I'm proud of how supportive you've been of both your sister and your mother. Harry, I'm counting on you to be there for them like you always have. I love you all very much and I always have. Never forget that._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm debating writing more scenes with either Terry or Freddy as the Pathfinder taking time to acknowledge that Harry's lost just as much as them with Alec's death on Habitat 7, but I'll leave it here for now.


End file.
